100post

When I first started my blog on July 6th, 2012, I expected, in my small way, to change the world.

At first, I knew I wanted to write about my experience living with my various diagnoses.  I wanted to explore both the frustration and the “fabulousness.”  I wanted a vehicle to help me make sense of what I was going through.

I have always known that I express myself better in writing than verbally.  In my case, there is one huge reason for that.  When I am communicating with someone, I don’t know what their previous experience with disability happens to be.  Through no fault of their own, most people see me as different and treat me accordingly.  Writing has no expectation, no judgments, and no preconceived ideas.  Therefore, it is much easier for me to be truly authentic when I am writing things down because I don’t have to battle anyone’s assumptions of who I am before I start to express myself.  With my blog, although I knew some people would be reading the things I wrote, they weren’t right in front of me.  That meant that I could create a kind of distance or detachment, while I still had the ability to pour out everything in my heart.  It worked.

I know that my experience is just that. Mine.  I don’t claim to be an expert on disability issues.  I don’t think that my way of going about my daily life or overcoming challenges is by any means the best or the only way.  I can say with conviction that I have put forth great effort to explain how things feel to me and why.

My blog has explored topics related to disability awareness, dignity, and respect, etiquette in communicating with people with disabilities and many of my personal stories, as well as some stories about people I very much admire.

After a while, I got more comfortable with my writing and started to explore issues that were deeper, like body image, confidence, loneliness, and my struggle with depression and my psychiatric diagnosis.

The “change the world” part came as I started to think about the negative perceptions that some people in society have about those of us with disabilities, and I started to talk about how some people treat me as “less than” or talk to the people I am with about what I might want or need instead of talking to me directly.  I sincerely want to do all I can to change that perception,  I much prefer to focus on the power instead of the pity aspect of my life.

I think challenging those perceptions and breaking down barriers between people with disabilities and those without disabilities is truly what I was born to do.

Why am I bringing this up now?

Because a few days ago I put my 100th post on this blog.

Back in the summer of 2012, I wasn’t sure I would ever get here.  A friend, who was a blogger herself, suggested that I start a blog and to simply see where it went.  This has been a raw, challenging, life changing journey and I can’t imagine at this point, what I would do if writing on my blog wasn’t part of what I do. It is my safe place, my way to vent, a medium that allows me, some days, to quiet the noise in my head.  I would never have imagined, when I started, that seven of my blog posts so far have turned into Chicken Soup for the Soul stories. This whole experience has been nothing short of amazing.

Looking back on some of my older posts I can see that I have grown and maybe matured a bit.  I think am more likely to be tolerant instead of angry these days at the times when other people are simply unaware.  At least I hope so.

So I have a request for all of you who are reading this post right now.  Can you tell me what your favorite post(s) has been about and why?  I would really love to hear your thoughts about the posts that have made a difference…

I know there are many posts to choose from and I wouldn’t dream of asking anyone to go back through and read all 100 (unless you want to of course) I am simply asking for your feedback as to which posts resonated with you the most so that I can have a bit more of a sense of where to go in the future.

Please comment below or send me a message on Facebook if you are so inclined.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you all for coming along on this ride with me.

What do you think?  Have I changed the world?